Steps to Love and Romance in Islam

Source: perfectmuslimwedding.com

By: Shaikh Abdul Rahman Murphy

1. There are 4 types of maturity: Financial, Spiritual, Physical, and Emotional. For most people they are lacking 2 of the 4.
2. Emotional maturity is very important. How will you deal with situation if you lose job, wife can’t get pregnant, how you handle in-laws, etc. Ask yourself “Am I emotionally mature to live with someone who has different likes/dislikes?”
3. You don’t have the right to judge without having communicated.
4. Married life is about Mawada and Rahma (Mercy).
5. If there is physical or verbal abuse, see a counselor.
6. In a Muslim home there needs to be an attitude of gratitude. Think what your spouse and kids are doing, not what they are not doing. Kids thank parents. Parents thank kids.
7. Romance between spouses is religious. The Prophet (SAW) said in a Hadith when asked who he loved most, it was Aisha (RA). When asked from men, then, “her father” reference still being her. He (SAW) had a nickname for her “Aish.” Find out what your spouse’s likes and dislikes are. Flowers and chocolates may work, but may not.
8. Compromise is the mortar of marriage. It holds the bricks together and makes it strong. Prophet (SAW) gave in to his wives on small wishes, but never sacrificed on principles.
9. Number one cause of divorce in the US is money. This is why Financial maturity is important.
10. Part of the rizk (sustenance) you have been given is your health. That is physical, mental, and spiritual. You can’t neglect any of them.
11. When you get angry, follow the Hadith, “The strong one is who controls himself in anger.” This requires self-control and discipline.  Make wudu as water cools the fire that rages from anger.
12.  Put Allah back in the equation. When we look at a relationship we only think of 2 people.  Don’t treat people the way they are meant to be treated. Ask yourself how are my prayers? Those who pray together, stay together.
13. Make dua like you mean it.

Other things a husband can do to do to keep the spark of love alive from Sh. Faraz Ibn Adam:

Learn Ayat Al-Kursi online

 Bismillahir-Rahmanir-Raheem

Allahu la ilaha illa Huwa, Al-Haiyul-Qaiyum
La ta’khudhuhu sinatun wa la nawm,
lahu ma fis-samawati wa ma fil-‘ard
Man dhal-ladhi yashfa’u ‘indahu illa bi-idhnihi
Ya’lamu ma baina aidihim wa ma khalfahum,
wa la yuhituna bi shai’im-min ‘ilmihi illa bima sha’a
Wasi’a kursiyuhus-samawati wal ard,
wa la ya’uduhu hifdhuhuma Wa Huwal ‘Aliyul-Adheem

 In the Name of Allâh, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.

“Allah! There is no god but He – the Living, The Self-subsisting, Eternal. No slumber can seize Him Nor Sleep. His are all things In the heavens and on earth. Who is there can intercede In His presence except As he permitteth? He knoweth What (appeareth to His creatures As) Before or After or Behind them. Nor shall they compass Aught of his knowledge Except as He willeth. His throne doth extend Over the heavens And on earth, and He feeleth No fatigue in guarding And preserving them, For He is the Most High. The Supreme (in glory).”
(This Verse 2:255 is called Ayat al-Kursi)

15 Facts and Benefits of Ayatul Kursi

How to Protect your Home from the Shayateen (devils)

Source: http://www.missionislam.com

1) It is important to note that the bricks and mortar of your home do not become “possessed” nor do they become “holy” – the shayateen don’t have anything against your house as an object! They will cause problems to affect you and your children – both psychological and physical

How to do wudu (for Muslims) (Video)

 The Qur’an says “For Allah loves those who turn to Him constantly and He loves those who keep themselves pure and clean.” In regards to Muslims being required to be clean when handling and reading the Qur’an, the Qur’an says “Which none shall touch but those who are clean.”The Islamic prophet Muhammad said that “Cleanliness is half of faith”.

3 Steps to be the Best Child to your Parent!

By: Zohra Sarwari

Source: http://zohrasarwari.com/

Bismillahhe Rahmanee Raheem – Often when I give a speech for the Muslim Youth, at the end of it I am asked “How can I change and be the best child to my parent?”

SubhanAllaah, this shows me that if we were to teach our children the importance of parenthood, then they would actually reflect on the subject and possibly change their behaviors for the better.  Glory be to Allaah for all of His favors.  The problem that many of us have is that we do not teach our children how to be the best child.

InshAllaah today I will be teaching just that.  I am writing this article for all of the youth out there who want to know in 3 simple steps how to be the best child inshAllaah.   If you are one of those youth, then I would like to begin by saying mashAllaah I am proud of you first for reading this article.  That tells me a lot about you as a person.  If you have the courage to admit that you could be a better child, and you want to learn more skills that alone says a lot about your character.  However, to fully benefit from this article you need to actually put the information from this article into action- inshAllaah.

Before we get started I want to ask you one question.  Will you commit to me that you will use these 3 steps as often as you can until it eventually becomes habit?  Please say YES.  InshAllaah you said yes, and our journey begins.

Let’s start with Bismillah:

 

Step 1.  Always say “At your Service Umme or Abi (Mom or Dad)”:

What does this mean.  Well when you’re called upon to do something without a second thought say “At your service Umme or Abi.  That means I am ready to do as you wish.  With those words coming out of your mouth, your actions inshAllaah will be sincere as they take into effect next.   You see sometimes the words coming out of our mouth helps us put our actions to ease as they take effect into the next few minutes.  Believe me just saying this will make you smile and be ready to serve your parents.

 

 Action Step:  Practice saying “At your service Umme/Abi.  Say this 20 times to yourself, until you feel comfortable saying it inshAllaah.

It should be natural and easy to come out of your mouth.   Everytime you say these words to your parents and actually do what they ask you to do inshAllaah Allaah will bless you more, and you will feel happier.  When our parents are happy with us, Allaah subhana wa Tala is happy with us, when our parents are angry with us Allaah subhana wa Tala is angry with us.

The Prophet (Sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam) said:“The pleasure of Allaah is from the pleasure of the parents, and the anger of Allah is from the anger of the parents.”

So let’s not make our parents angry and instead earn their pleasure, for when we do good to them, we make our Lord happy.  SubhanAllaah what a beautiful religion Islam is, Allaah subhana wa Tala only wants the best from each of us.   By taking the action step as I proposed you’re on your way to success inshAllaah.

13 STEPS TO MEMORIZE THE QURAN BY YASIR QADHI

Source: muslimmatters.org

By: Yasir Qadhi

Realize it’s a spiritual AND physical project. It’s a miracle and blessing from Allah that you’re able to absorb the Qur’an. If you want to take advantage of this blessing, you should be in a position to receive it and therefore strive physically to achieve it and strive spiritually to get the maximum benefit.

1.  Sincerity. The first matter you have to pay attention to is your intention (if you intend good you will get good). Make sure that the intention you are making is only for the sake of Allah ,  to seek His Pleasure so that insha’Allah, with His Mercy, we will be rewarded in the Aakhirah. It is not to show off in front of others that you have memorized a lot. Sincerity is not a one time factor rather it’s a continual battle that you always have to renew.

12 Steps to Getting Someone to Open Up

How challenges can strengthen your relationship

Source: psychologytoday.com

By: Linda Bloom and Charlie Bloom

One of the most frequently-voiced complaints that we hear from clients and students (and admittedly, it tends to be women who we hear it from) is, “He won’t talk to me,” or, “I can’t get him to open up. No matter what I do, I don’t get anything more than a one-word response,” or, “I’m so frustrated, I could scream.”

No one likes to hear bad news but the truth is that the consequences of refusing to listen or talk about upsetting issues can be far more painful and damaging than the experience of discussing them.

Steps in achieving tranquility of the heart

By: Jinan Bastaki

Source: http://www.onislam.net

Sometimes it feels like it’s just too much – these fluctuations in our faith, the repeated sinning, the feeling that “I just don’t deserve Allah’s mercy.”

The tests always feel like punishments. There is a constant worry about the future: my marriage, my money, my career, my nation… And some difficulties just feel like they are too great to overcome. We know we’re not supposed to ask this, but the question at the back of our minds is: “Why me?”

We have all heard that we should never despair of God’s mercy. And on the surface, we try not to, but the Devil has a trick. We tend to despair of ourselves and our incapacity to change things, especially the inner turmoil that we feel. And the effect of this is basically the same as despairing of God’s mercy. We do not always accept that God can take us out of the situation we are in and we don’t need to ‘deserve’ the trouble; God isn’t punishing us and we don’t need to be perfect.

This doesn’t mean, however, that we shouldn’t strive, or take ourselves to account when we do mess up. The key is to develop our relationship with God during that trouble. If we know God, no situation is too hopeless. No sadness is ever permanent. We perceive trials as they are meant to be perceived – as tests of our trust in God, forcing us to put our knowledge into practice and bringing us closer to Him. These trials could potentially be a punishment too, that is if we let it affect us negatively by completely turning away from Him because of our sadness. But our awareness of our own state and our understanding of God’s mercy allows us to turn the punishment into something positive that is manifested through repentance to God, alongside increasing in good deeds in order to erase the bad ones.

The first exercise is for us to consciously realize that God knows. Whatever grief we go through, whatever hardship we endure, we must understand that we are never alone. Even if we feel abandoned by the world and those closest to us, God is there. He reminds us in the Quran: {Fear not. Indeed, I am with you [both]; I hear and I see.} (Ta-Ha 20: 46)

As long as we begin by recognizing that God is with us and He is close to us, there remains a solution to our inner worries. There are things we need to know in order to develop our relationship with God. Then there are things we need to do in order to maintain that closeness to God. And finally, there are things we need to aspire for to achieve the ideal relationship with our Lord. We pray that by the end of the series, we will all have developed a stronger relationship with God.

5 STEPS TO STOP WATCHING PORN! (VIDEO)

 In this episode of The Deen Is Advice we bring you 5 Steps To Stop Watching Porn!