Masturbation; after-effects and causes

By: Dr. Sayeed Ahmad D. I. Hom.

Source: http://www.homeoint.org/

Masturbation is the process of bringing about a voluntary excitement of the sexual centers following generally by the discharge of semen, through some method other than normal sexual intercourse. In other words, “Masturbation” means ejaculation of semen by hand. There are various devices resorted to for the purpose, but because of the hand to practise it, it is widely known as “Hand Practice”. This habit is also known as “Self-Abuse”, since it is done by one’s own self by his own hand.

How to overcome the desire for Masturbation

Whipping the One-Eyed Wonder, jerking off, jacking off and pumping the moisture-seeking venomous throbbing python of love are all common terms of the widely practiced worldly pleasure called “masturbation”. Jerking off is a colossal problem in today’s Muslim community, and so you ask “what’s making it a big problem?” Its normality in modern society. Surveys, conducted in the United States, show that 95% of men admit to masturbating, compared to 89% of women. After reading those facts, any Muslim would say “Oh everyone’s doing it, why shouldn’t I? It looks pretty normal and, after all, it’s not like I’m harming anyone or anything?” Wrong. Those are Shaytan’s persuasive thoughts. Jacking off is forbidden and very unhealthy.

{“And those who guard their chastity (i.e. private parts, from illegal sexual acts). Except from their wives or (the captives and slaves) that their right hands possess, – for them, they are free from blame. But whoever seeks beyond that, then those are the transgressors.” 23.5-7} Here’s my story:

It all started when I was 13 years old. I never knew what tickling the monkey meant but I knew it was deemed as extremely inappropriate. So I decided to approach my fellow preadolescence classmates instead of my parents as I thought they would punish me for starting such improper discussion. When I went to discuss it with my circle of school friends, I coincidentally found them already discussing the topic. Immediately, I realized it was a big NO-NO and that they had learned it from their relatives. Later that day, one of them personally came up to and told me that he lied and tried it but he said even though it hurt a lot, he felt a slight ticklish feeling of pleasure which lead him to do it monthly, then weekly, then daily. Months passed by and the majority of my classmates started doing it proudly and happily, recommending everyone else to do it and giving helpful tips like including graphically inappropriate videos to the mix, so I thought to myself, what the heck?

That question demolished my life. I jerked off for three consecutive years, making it more addictive month by month, week by week and day by day. It was the worst and most sinful timeline of my life. Even though I always felt physically and mentally weak, I was constantly ready and excited to do any single thing related to sexuality just to increase that never-ending crave for artificial pleasure and the more I increased it, the more I looked forward to it. It became so destructive that my brain, as a whole, was only committed to sex and nothing but sex. I really hated jerking off; I hated the fact that I couldn’t stop even after promising myself a whole lot of times that I’d never do it again.

Masturbating loved me so much it forced me to break my own promises. The holy month of Ramadan was around the corner. I realized that this month would be my best chance to stop this drug. I made a plan to completely stop in Ramadan by asking AIlah for help but I knew you can’t SINCERELY ask Allah for help if your Imaan is weak to begin with. No matter how strong your Imaan is, we pickle-ticklers have weak Imaan. Admit it. I used to pray 1-2 times a day so I decided to get closer to Allah by trying to pray five times a day. I achieved that by mid-Ramadan and already felt a wave of relief crashing into my body. I started fearing Allah more and more until I finally felt guilty enough to ask Him for help.

Finally, I sincerely promised Him to never do it again and asked for help to accomplish it with ease. And I never did it again Just like that. I was addicted to this drug for three full years and just by sincerely asking Allah for help, I completely stopped which is miraculous if you ask me. Ever since that promise, I’ve been leading such a grateful and productive life, I don’t even listen to music and that’s coming from a seventeen year old.

My writing of this article proves the openness of my mind after a deep-sleep for three complete years. To all the Muslims that tickle their pickle: Stop. Stop immediately by solely following Allah’s orders and fearing His punishment, lowering your gaze and avoiding the illusion that masturbation is permissible because it prevents you from committing illegal sexual acts (Zina). Allah is always watching you anytime and anywhere {Indeed Allah is ever watching you. Quran,4:1}. Don’t you feel shameful and embarrassed now not realizing that you are directly disobeying your Creator while He’s watching you (while doing it) and not knowing the fact that humans were only made to worship Allah? Your death is getting closer by each breath you take so stop it now, ask your Creator for help and repent before it’s too late.Allah always listens and is the Most-Forgiving:

{And when My servants ask you, [O Muhammad], concerning Me – indeed I am near. I respond to the invocation of the supplicant when he calls upon Me. So let them respond to Me [by obedience] and believe in Me that they may be [rightly] guided. The Cow, 2:186}. 

Inshallah, this video might make you stop alone:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CTKIqFki5R0. For any help on how to stop this “Drug” please contact me at homieomt@hotmail.com. You’ll lead a better life.

By: Omar Toutounji

http://maestrouzy.com/struggling-with-masturbation/

How to Stop Masturbation

Masturbation is defined as the manual stimulation of the male or female genitals, not by sexual intercourse, designed to produce an orgasm. Masturbation is totally forbidden in Shari’ah.

One of the most humiliating problems that the constant male masturbator suffers from when he attempts to have sexual relations is premature ejaculation or the failure to maintain an erection. When a person is masturbating, he tends to reach his orgasm as quickly as possible but in sexual intercourse, he normally has to attempt to control his excitement which can impose a great strain on those who indulge in self abuse over a lengthy period.

Those who achieve insufficient satisfaction from sexual intercourse and return to masturbation or never give it up suffer a great torment. Sex life is empty for them, which leads to many more problems, marital disputes, divorce, etc.

Therefore, people who continuously masturbate lose out all round. The physical pleasure becomes reduced to a natural act like urinating or excreting and at the back of their minds there is an awareness that they are missing out on the real pleasures of life. No adult can honestly claim to masturbate without a guilty feeling of complete uselessness. Masturbation is merely an exhaustive rather than constructive undertaking resulting in nothing but total loss. Once orgasm has been achieved, there is nothing left except a feeling of complete emptiness.

Steps in overcoming masturbation

Be assured that you can be cured of your difficulty. Many have been, both male and female. And you can also be cured if you determine that it must be so. If you want to give it up, you need will power and determination. Rasulullah [sallallaahu alayhi wasallam] said, ‘The Niyyat of a believer is better than the act.’

This determination is the first step. That is where we begin. Firstly, you must decide that you will end this practice and when you make that decision, the problem will be greatly reduced at once. But it must be more than a hope or a wish more than knowing that it is good for you. You must realize that this is a great evil and you have to want to give it up.

It must be actually a decision. If you truly make up your mind that you will be cured, then you will have the strength to resist any tendencies which you may have and any temptations which may come to you. Ask Allah to help you and give you strength and steadfastness to succeed.

After you have made this decision then observe the following specific guidelines.

Guidelines 

1. First step is to realize that you are violating Allah’s command and you are bringing upon yourself a life long destruction and harm.

2. Never touch the intimate parts of your body unnecessarily.

3. Avoid being alone as much as possible. Find good company and stay in this good company. Remember, an idle mind is the devil’s (Shaytaan) workshop.

4. If you are associated with other persons having this same problem, you must break off their friendship. Never associate with other people having the same weakness. Don’t suppose that both of you will quit together, you never will. You must get away from people of that kind. Just to be in their presence will keep your problem foremost in your mind.

The problem must be taken out of your mind for that is where it really exists. Your mind must be on other and more wholesome things. It is mentioned in a Hadith that a person is upon the way of his friend. (Bukhari, Tirmizi)

5. When you bath, do so as quick as possible.

6. When in bed, if that is where you have your problem for the most part, dress yourself for the night so securely that you cannot easily touch your vital parts so that it would be difficult and time consuming for you to remove those clothes. By the time you started to remove protective clothing, you would have sufficiently controlled your thinking and the temptation would leave you.
If the temptation seems overpowering while you are in bed, engage in something useful. The purpose behind this suggestion is that you focus your mind on something else. You are the subject of your thoughts, so to speak.

7. Never look at pornographic material.

8. The attitude of the individual has an effect on how easy it is to overcome. It is essential that a firm commitment be made to control this habit. The person must first realize the evil of this act. Secondly he must understand the reason for this behavior.

After these 2 steps, the individual needs to become sensitive to the situations and conditions which may cause a person to commit this vile act. Hence a person must guard himself from anything, which may trigger a desire for this act. By following these steps, a person gains the ability to gain victory from this act, hence the power to control this filthy practice is developed. Remember you need also a bit of will-power.

Supplications to Stop Masturbation

Question:

Are there any duas to help with stopping masturbation?

Assalamu Alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh

Thank you for your question.

The Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him and give him peace) used to say, “O Allah, I ask You for guidance, piety, dignified restraint, and freedom from need. (Allahumma inni as’aluka’l huda wa’t tuqa wa’l `afafa wa’l ghina)” [Sahih Muslim] (See also: Prophetic Supplication for Guidance, Piety, Restraint, and Freedom from Need Prophetic Example in Our Daily Relations)

اللَّهُمَّ إِنِّي أَسْأَلُكَ الْهُدَى وَالتُّقَى وَالْعَفَافَ وَالْغِنَى

The following supplication has been narrated by Qutb al-Din al-Hanafi in his Kitab Ad`iyat al-Hajj wa al-`Umra and is attributed to Hasan al-Basri.

“O Allah, I seek Your forgiveness for every sin in which I gave preference to my base desire over Your obedience and my passion over Your command – thus I contented myself with Your wrath and subjected myself to Your displeasure, though You had forbidden me, presented Your admonition to me, and established the proof of it to me through Your warnings [of punishment in Your revelations]. I seek Your forgiveness, O Allah, and repent to You. (Allahumma inni astaghfiruka li kulli dhambin qaddamtu fihi shahwati `ala ta`atik wa athartu fihi mahabbati `ala amrik fa ardaytu nafsi bi ghadabik wa `arradtuha li sakhatik idh nahaytani wa qaddamta ilayya fihi indharak wa tahhajajta `alayya fihi bi wa`idik wa astaghfiruka Allahumma wa atubu ilayk)”

اللَّهُمَّ إِنِّى أِسْتَغْفِرُكَ لِكُلِّ ذَنْبٍ قَدَّمْتُ فِيْهِ شَهْوَتِى عَلَى طَاعَتِكَ وَآثَرْتُ فِيهِ مَحَبَّتِى عَلَى أَمْرِكَ فَأَرْضَيْتُ نَفْسِى بِغَضَبِكَ وَعَرَّضْتُهَا لِسَخَطِكَ إِذْ نَهَيْتَنِى وَقَدَّمْتَ إِلَيَّ فِيْهِ إِنْذَارَكَ وَتَحَجَّجْتَ عَلَيَّ فِيْهِ بِوَعِيْدِكَ وَأَسْتَغْفِرُكَ اللَّهُمَّ وَأَتُوْبُ إِلَيْكَ

“O Allah, Your mercy I am hopeful for, so do not leave me to myself for the blink of an eye, and put all my affairs in order, there is no god but You. (Allahumma rahmataka arju fala takilni ila nafsi tarfata `ayanin wa aslih li sha’ni kullihi la ilaha illa anta)” [Abu Dawud]

اللَّهُمَّ رَحْمَتَكَ أَرْجُوْ فَلَا تَكِلْنِي إِلَى نَفْسِي طَرْفَةَ عَيْنٍ وَأَصْلِحْ لِي شَأْنِي كُلِّهِ لَا إِلَهَ إِلَّا أَنْتَ

Say the supplications with heart and sincerity, seeking closeness to the Divine, and seeking to be pulled out of the darkness of sin. Don’t lose heart, take the positive means to stop the sin, and always ask Allah as He loves to be asked.

And Allah alone gives success.

Answered by Tabraze Azam
SeekersGuidance