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Bengal Kitten (IMAGE)

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info-pictogram1 “It seems that from early days the Arabs kept cats as pets. Otherwise we could not understand why (according to one early historian) the Prophet’s (saw) young widow, A’isha, when complaining that everyone had deserted her, added: ‘Even the cat has left me alone’ .” In contrast to other civilisations, “they were companions of most of the Muslims… from a housewife to a great scholar, they were loved, not only for their beauty or elegance but also for their practical purposes. For example, Muslim scholars wrote odes for their cats because they protected their precious books from attack by animals such as mice.

Why Problems Are Good For You

problem

Did you ever experience a dark phase in your life? Lost a job or a loved one? Financial or health problems? Been through a divorce or a rough marriage? Did you find yourself looking towards the sky and asking “Why me?” while hoping and yearning for that perfect life?

If you answered ‘no’ to these questions then better you stop reading right now because this article won’t interest you. If you answered ‘yes’ to any of the above questions then read on….There’s good news and bad news…

The Bad News

I am going to be straight with you. If you waiting for that ‘perfect life’, you going to wait for a long time because that life doesn’t exist. If there was such a thing as a ‘perfect life’, Allah would have given it to His closest servants, the Prophets (Peace be upon them), but they lived lives stacked with difficulty. I won’t elaborate on their sacrifices for I fear this piece will be too long but understand one thing…from marriage to kids, finance to health, the Prophets of Allah (Peace be upon them) experienced an avalanche of trials, and of course, our beloved Muhammad (PBUH) seen the worst. Despite the fact that he was Allah’s most beloved creation, he was orphaned at a young age, lost all his male progeny while still infants and went for days without food just to mention a few.

I know what you thinking…”What about the rich and famous in today’s era?”. Well, truth be told, despite the wealth, there is no happiness. Drug scandals, love affairs, depression, jail -time, I don’t know about you but I don’t see happiness in Hollywood. I mean seriously, I could hold my breath longer than some celebrity marriages. These problems are common and experienced by everyone. The poet says it up beautifully…

“The healthy seek wealth..wealthy seek health..
husbands seek jobs.. employed seek wives..
these are the days of our lives.” 
@poetrypencil

The Good News

So why did the Prophets of Allah experience rough patches and why do YOU experience rough patches? Because Allah loves them and Allah loves…YOU.

A Hadeeth states:

“When Allah intends good for a person He puts him/her through a test.”(Bukhaari)

But why would Allah put you through difficulty? It doesn’t make sense. It goes against logic!

Well, ask yourself these questions…

1) How often do I read Tahaajud in good times?

2) How much Dhikr do I make in good times?

Very little?

Now ask yourself this…

1) How often do I make Dua in difficult times?

2) How often do I think of Allah in difficult times?

Quite a bit?

The above Hadith makes more sense now doesn’t it?

The point is Allah puts you through a test because He wants the best for you. He wants you to be closer to Him. We might not realize it but ‘happy times’ takes us further away from Allah. We only turn to Him in our days of darkness. With every rough patch we become His friend and He loves that…He loves YOU.

Also, good news, your sins are being forgiven…

“never a believer is stricken with discomfort, hardship, illness, grief or even with mental worry except that his/her sins are forgiven” (Bukhaari, Muslim)

“A Muslim male or female continues to remain under  trial in respect of his/her life, property and offspring  till he/she meets Allah in a condition that all of his/her sins are forgiven.” (Tirmidhi)

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Ten ways to avoid marrying the wrong person

The following is a useful resource we can use to help us figure out what sort of person we should marry, and can also come in handy when asking questions!

There is a right way and a wrong way to get to know someone for marriage. The wrong way is to get caught up in the excitement and nuance of a budding relationship and in the process completely forget to ask the critical questions that help determine compatibility. One of the biggest mistakes that many young Muslims make is rushing into marriage without properly and thoroughly getting to know someone.

A common myth is that the duration of a courtship is an accurate enough measure of how compatible two people are. The logic follows that the longer you speak with someone, the better you will know them. The problem with that premise is that no consideration is given to how that time is spent.

Increasingly, young Muslim couples are engaging in “halal dating,” which is basically socializing with each other in the company of friends and/or family. This includes going out to dinner, watching a movie, playing some sport or other leisure activity, etc. Depending on the family or culture, conversations are either minimal & chaperoned or worse, unrestricted and unsupervised. When you consider these limitations it makes one wonder when exactly, if ever at all, would the critical conversations take place? Unfortunately, for many, the answer is never and they live to suffer the consequences. If you or someone you know is in the “getting to know someone” phase, the following guide offers advice on exactly what to look for and avoid:

1) Do Not Marry Potential: 

Oftentimes men consider marrying a woman hoping she never changes while a woman considers marrying a man she hopes she can change. This is the wrong approach on both accounts. Don’t assume that you can change a person after you’re married to them or that they will reach their potential. There is no guarantee, after all, that those changes will be for the better. In fact, it’s often for the worse. If you can’t accept someone or imagine living with them as they are then don’t marry them. These differences can include a number of things such as ideological or practical differences in religion, habits, hygiene, communication skills, etc.

2) Choose Character over Chemistry: 

While chemistry and attraction are no doubt important, character precedes them both. A famous quote follows, “Chemistry ignites the fire, but character keeps it burning.” The idea of falling “in love” should never be the sole reason for marrying someone; it is very easy to confuse infatuation and lust for love. The most important character traits to look for include humility, kindness, responsibility, & happiness. Here’s a breakdown of each trait:

1. Humility: 
The humble person never makes demands of people but rather always does right by them. They put their values and principles above convenience and comfort. They are slow to anger, are modest, and avoid materialism.

2. Kindness:
The kind person is the quintessential giver. They seek to please and minimize the pain of others. To know if a person is a giver, observe how they treat their family, siblings, and parents. Do they have gratitude towards their parents for all that they’ve done for them? If not, then know that they will never appreciate what you do for them. How do they treat people they don’t have to be kind towards (i.e. waiters, sales associates, employees, etc)? How do they spend their money? How do they deal with anger; their own anger and their reaction to someone else’s anger?

3. Responsibility: 
A responsible person has stability in their finances, relationships, job, and character. You can you rely on this person and trust what they say.

4. Happiness:
A happy person is content with their portion in life. They feel good about themselves and good about their life. They focus on what they have rather than on what they don’t have. They very rarely complain.

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Convenience is bad for the soul and it is loved in life.

gb copy Convenience is bad for the soul and it is loved in life.
es copy La comodidad es malo para el alma y es amado en la vida.
nl copy Gemak is slecht voor de ziel en het is geliefd in het leven.
fr copy La commodité est mauvais pour l’âme et il est aimé dans la vie.
de copy Convenience ist schlecht für die Seele und es ist im Leben geliebt.