By: Shaikh Abdul Rahman Murphy
- There are 4 types of maturity: Financial, Spiritual, Physical, and Emotional. For most people they are lacking 2 of the 4.
- Emotional maturity is very important. How will you deal with situation if you lose job, wife can’t get pregnant, how you handle in-laws, etc. Ask yourself “Am I emotionally mature to live with someone who has different likes/dislikes?”
- You don’t have the right to judge without having communicated.
- Married life is about Mawada and Rahma (Mercy).
- If there is physical or verbal abuse, see a counselor.
- In a Muslim home there needs to be an attitude of gratitude. Think what your spouse and kids are doing, not what they are not doing. Kids thank parents. Parents thank kids.
- Romance between spouses is religious. The Prophet (SAW) said in a Hadith when asked who he loved most, it was Aisha (RA). When asked from men, then, “her father” reference still being her. He (SAW) had a nickname for her “Aish.” Find out what your spouse’s likes and dislikes are. Flowers and chocolates may work, but may not.
- Compromise is the mortar of marriage. It holds the bricks together and makes it strong. Prophet (SAW) gave in to his wives on small wishes, but never sacrificed on principles.
- Number one cause of divorce in the US is money. This is why Financial maturity is important.
- Part of the rizk (sustenance) you have been given is your health. That is physical, mental, and spiritual. You can’t neglect any of them.
- When you get angry, follow the Hadith, “The strong one is who controls himself in anger.” This requires self-control and discipline. Make wudu as water cools the fire that rages from anger.
- Put Allah back in the equation. When we look at a relationship we only think of 2 people. Don’t treat people the way they are meant to be treated. Ask yourself how are my prayers? Those who pray together, stay together.
- Make dua like you mean it.
Other things a husband can do to do to keep the spark of love alive from Sh. Faraz Ibn Adam:
One of the hardest parts of parenting is getting our kids to listen to us, and then, of course, getting them to do what we ask!
If you remember to use a few important skills this job will be much easier for you. Insha Allah
Think before you speak.
You tell your daughter it’s time to leave, then take twenty more minutes to get yourself ready. You ask your kids to clean up the family room, then allow the mess to remain for the night. You threaten to cancel your child’s trip if he speaks badly to you again. He does, but you don’t. All these scenes create kids who have “selective hearing.” Instead, take a minute to think before you issue a command, be specific, and your words will become more accurate and meaningful.
By: Umm Ammarah
Dad what can I do next???…Mum I’m BORED!!! For parents vacations can be really demanding keeping our children occupied. Vacations pose a great challenge for many parents. However holidays can be great fun if parents are positive, creative and interactive. Also during the vacation there is a good opportunity to recharge our kid’s spiritual batteries and start afresh in daily activities. It is a joyous period and a unique break from our busy schedules. We should welcome vacations for its fun.
The excitement surrounding vacations and family trips usually kicks off with strong excitement. However, after only a short time away from the daily routines of school, one phrase parents dread hearing begins to creep into the language of children almost instinctively: “I’M BORED”!
By: Nur Kose, Nura F, and Safiyyah Ghori
Every year, millions of Muslims around the world gather to Mecca for Hajj. Many men and women complete the sacred rituals that Muslims have been doing for hundreds, even thousands of years. During Hajj season, people around the world watch the daily tawaafs around the ka’bah on TV and on the Internet, observing the Hajjis fulfill the pilgrimage of a lifetime. People wonder about the Hajjis’ stories, their trips, how long their journeys will be, and how they feel in such a sacred place. What many observers don’t realize or consider, however, are the stories of the children left behind at home.
Some girls have collaborated together and have compiled some stories and experiences of Hajjis’ kids on the homefront. Kids from all around the United States share what it was like for them to be at home while their parents were off at Hajj.
By: Shifnas Bint Thamiem
Being in the middle of a newly bloomed garden with cool breeze early in the morning nourishes our feelings. Spending time with little kids, who look like buds waiting to blossom, gives us the same kind of refreshment. These little flowers of our ummah can pour joy and happiness into our lives. Noisy chit chats, innocent giggles, messy acts and pure smiles bring tranquility to our hearts.
Subhan Allah, kids are an amaanat from Allah . They are but a trust from Allah and we should handle them with extra care. We, as guardians, will be questioned about how we exercised our responsibilities while taking care of our amaanat.
Please share this valuable information that could save a child from brain damage or even dead. The Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) taught his companions never hit the face or head of children or even adults. Many parents are not aware of the serious dangers linked with shaking a baby or young child. Abusive head trauma (AHT) can not only be caused by hitting the child on the head but also by shaking. Today there is a common problem across the world known as Abusive head trauma (AHT) that can be caused by direct blows to the head, dropping or throwing a child, or shaking a child.
Fast food giants McDonald’s and KFC have apologized to Chinese customers for using expired meat from a local supplier in China. Now Starbucks and Burger King have also been engulfed in the mess. The revelation was made in a local Chinese TV investigation. Food safety is a big concern in China after a 2008 milk scandal which led to the death of six kids and made thousands sick.